


once in a lifetime

by choi_kimmy



Category: Wonder Woman (Movies - Jenkins), wonder woman 1984 - Fandom
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Canon Compliant, F/M, I am STILL reeling and this is my coping mechanism, I mean if you've seen WW84 you would know, Post-Canon, but in all honesty Diana deserves all the happiness in the world goddamnit, yes more angst is my coping mechanism oh pain pain pain
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-26
Updated: 2020-12-26
Packaged: 2021-03-11 02:53:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 967
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28338000
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/choi_kimmy/pseuds/choi_kimmy
Summary: "The universe seems hell bent on not wanting a happily ever after for her -- and maybe that’s just her destiny. She has always been slated for greater things, as her mother would always tell her. Perhaps true love never was in that equation of that greater thing, that Steve Trevor was merely a person in passing on borrowed time, a footnote in her story when she wanted more than anything else for him to be chapters of her book."Or in other words; Diana returns home after the battle, her heart tired and heavy.
Relationships: Diana (Wonder Woman)/Steve Trevor
Comments: 10
Kudos: 107





	once in a lifetime

**Author's Note:**

> I just watched WW84 and I have massive feels that the first thing I did after coming home is to write this. Thoughts may be incoherent, but I just needed a channel to cope so fanfics it is. I hope this will be an enjoyable short read, albeit painful (maybe).

As the dust settles and she returns home with a heavy heart, Diana stops in the middle of her living room and casts a wayward glance around the space. The weight resting on her shoulders seems only to grow as seconds went by in that deafening silence.

Her house, Diana thinks slowly to herself, has it always been this desolate and empty? So cold and bleak that it almost terrifies her to take a step forward. She exhales shakily, wondering how it is possible that she is _afraid_ of her own sanctuary? A place she supposedly calls home?

Diana’s hand rests on her chest even without realising, as if to calm her pounding heart. Lump lodged in her throat, lips quivering slightly; a display of vulnerability she has not felt in a long time. Her eyes are stuck on places where _he’d_ just stood moments before, his scent somehow still lingering in the air. 

How could Steve be there with her mere hours ago, and now he is not? Now he would _never_ be, ever again?

The thought she’d pushed into the deepest recesses of her mind earlier in the day comes flitting into her head once again, so quickly, so suddenly, that Diana couldn’t prepare herself for that sharp inhale of air as realisation guts her in the stomach harshly. Her head starts to spin, her chest constricting as she stumbles towards the nearest wall for support. 

The battle is won but why does it feel like she’d lost?

Deep down, she knows why. And the tears, they come before she could even stop herself, her senses overwhelming her entire being. Diana slumps onto the floor helplessly, her sobs filling the quiet evening with echoes that would haunt her for the rest of the night. 

The universe seems hell bent on not wanting a happily ever after for her — and maybe that’s just her destiny. She has always been slated for greater things, as her mother would always tell her. Perhaps true love never was in that equation of that greater thing, that Steve Trevor was merely a person in passing on borrowed time, a footnote in her story when she wanted more than anything else for him to be chapters of her book.

She’d lose him again. She had been holding him just yesterday in her arms as he peppered kisses on her lips, all over her body. Diana had almost all of him yesterday. Today, in that fateful moment she should have seen coming since the second he came back to her, Diana has none of him. 

It is cruel. It is tragic.

To have everything she wanted in the palm of her hand after all those years of loss and yearning, the steady drumming of his heartbeat; the sign of life. To have a taste of genuine happiness so close, so near in the longest of time. To wake up not just to an empty space beside her, but to a morning filled with laughter in the presence of the man she cherishes. To remember the feeling of peace and serenity, to love and be loved.

They say time could heal a broken heart, but Diana knows enough to disagree. She knows from the ache settled permanently in her heart as she grieves, for the second time, over all the _what-ifs,_ and the _could-have-beens._ Time never truly heals; it could only numb the pain. And all Diana could do for the days to come is to hold her head high, swallow the bitter pill that is life, and carry on living. That is what he would want for her, anyway. She promises she would do that for him, but before that she finds herself whispering; _forgive me, Steve. Please allow me this one night to hurt._

And when Diana gathers her thoughts hours later, she would have reached a quiet acceptance. That her wish for more time with Steve has reached an unfortunate end. That the power of the Gods gave her only temporary happiness — nothing more, nothing less.

Even so, when Diana closes her eyes, she would still see his gentle and loving blue eyes, as deep as the ocean, as vast and clear as the sky. His other features mapped across her mind for eternity. His smile and his laughter, the way he would look at her — they carry a message of infinite hope and strength, a sincere wish for her to always search for the light even in the darkest hour. When Diana closes her eyes, she would hear her name on his lips, his soothing voice lulling her to sleep. His last words to her, etched in her memory.

And she will always remember him — Steve Trevor; pilot, allied spy, friend, partner, lover. It is a conviction she will carry with her forever, engraved in her heart and carved into her bones. 

She will remember the way he makes her feel, all the times when she would glance up and meet his gaze across the room. She will remember the way she would hold her hand out, the way he would slip his hand into hers without questioning, the smiles they would exchange only to each other. When it is the fourth of July and everyone celebrates the independence of the United States, she will remember him in the form of colorful fireworks, the bright hues a beautiful backdrop against the dark canvas of the night.

_I love you, Steve. I love you. I hope you know that._

A perfect piece of memory like the sunset, the ray of sunshine so warm and inviting.

_Thank you._

_For what?_ She imagines he would ask. 

Diana would smile and tell him; _for everything_.

She will always remember him — Steve Trevor; her greatest love, her greatest loss.

Her once in a lifetime.

* * *


End file.
